05/12/00
To say the least I'm alive today, my ear no longer feels like it's going to explode since I've been to the doctor and got some medicine. One thing I realized today is that I'm tired of just basing my journal around Josh this, Josh that...no pun intended to Josh, but it's almost as though I'm writing as if my life revolves around him, and god knows I really like the guy, but it probably gets a little bit boring listening about just him all of the time...so I'll try to write a little more centered around myself. I finally started eating again yesterday, and today, a good thing if you ask me, so long as I don't start eating everything in the house, which granted I've done before. I'm working really hard to loose the last five pounds that I gained a little while ago, and I'm going to do it the slow way, the way that I actually eat, and well...sometimes exercise, probably not today, because I don't feel like it right now. I know this is kind of going back on what I just said, but to fight (jokingly) futher with Tony on the subject of Josh....HE'S NOT A PIMP, HIS CAR'S NOT CHROMED DOWN (well in the sence that he tried to make it that way), AND WHO CARES IF HE HAS A CELL PHONE...I KNOW TONS OF PEOPLE THAT DO! Oh and atleast he's not like that Greg guy Amanda's going out with, I'm just making fun. I've never really met Amandas new boyfriend, but from what Sean says....well Sean thinks he's gay, but probably not since he's going out with Amanda. I don't know why it is that sometimes when I'm dating someone I tend to start forgetting that I exist, and that I love myself too.....I think that's what breaks up a lot of relationships, because someone liked you before you got together, when you loved yourself, and if you just completely change into something else that's got to be a turn off. On the other hand a bit of change is nice, just not a whole lot. I didn't get invited to the underclassmen awards thing, guess a's and b's just aren't good enough anymore.....I also didn't go to the band banquet.....but I lettered in Jazz band! Yippy! I'm going to buy a jacket to show off that I have a letter, I'm proud. My brother must be pretty mad that I have a letter and he doesn't, he's worked so hard at baseball all through highschool, and he's not going to get a letter till next year, his senior year. I can't believe my brother's going to be leaving after next year, it's one of those things you always know is going to happen, but it always seems like "oh it's so far away" and you don't put it into reality. I saw Matt L. last night for the first time in a few months, he's my ex guitar teacher, now a student at the University of Miami....the school I want to go to. I guess his band didn't get signed by sony like they were hoping, but they still have their house gig at a bar down there, and apparently he's working at old navy....I just kind of thought that would be funny to mention. That reminds me, at the concert last night my mom was talking to Matt and his parents, and she asked them about Josh, if there was anything she needed to know about him (they've known Josh for like 7 years maybe) but they said no, that he didn't do drugs, and that it looks as though his parents have a good grip on what he's doing and when he's doing it, the only thing matt said is that he's a show off (to josh: you know it, I told you so!) but then matt likes to show off his guitar skills too, I can't blame either of them, I'd show off if I thought I was good enough...:) Well this is long, and I owe myself some sleep...adios amigos...