01/30/00
It's been a strange weekend so far, though I can't say that I've gotten much accomplished in my life this weekend....it's been strange. I guess the week ended with the normal feeling of dissopointment, isn't there something more to life than this? But then again life's full of dissopointments. I'm still determined to go to Booker High next year, I have to, that's where I want to be...away from everything here. It's sad that it comes down to that, but it does, it really does. Then there's the play, I'll find out if I made it tomorrow, but I can't say that I think that I did, I don't think that I have a chance of seeing my name on that list tomorrow morning, but I can deal with that, there's always next year, another chance. I'm really trying hard to forget everything that's happened to me this year, it's difficult, but I have to do it, forget about everything I did, and everything I didn't do. I hope that as time goes on I'll take this part of my life as a learning experience, just as I've taken the rest, and learn from my mistakes, some that I will forget quickly, others that I will remember daily, but I'm to the point that that's ok, life goes on. The one thing that brings me more joy than anything else is the fact that I know that if not next year, than when I graduate, I can move away from here, far, far, away from here, and forget everything, and everyone that I ever knew, and I can start over from scratch somewhere else. Yesterday was the mark of a new beginning for 'The Sour Guavas' Sean is going to have surgery on his face, he wont be able to drum for 6 weeks, and the day after that we're supposed to have a gig, it's scary, but I think we can do it, I really do. We will be an opening act for Steel Toe, another teenage band where I live. I really hope that we can pull this off, it would really be a blessing, and something good happening around here for once...I swear people only tear eachother apart most of their lives....it's pathetic. I can't wait to go to Miami this summer, get to see my mandi, and my manda, and get to engage in some intelligent conversations with some of the older people that help out, it's so much fun...no more rediculous, immature people for a few weeks, It's heaven in a nut shell. Well what can I say that's about all....phew....what a long day!