01/18/00
Well I've had some time to cool off, I suppose, I mean my friends ragging on Bobby at lunch today made me feel a lot better, and atleast I'm talking now, where as I wouldn't speak a word this morning...to anyone. I've felt sick constantly for the past two days, and I'm beyond bodily stress. I can't believe I ever believed a word he said to me, they play over and over in my head.... "No, I can't live without you" "What do I have if I don't have you?" " The people at ranch only like me cause i'm funny" "I love you more than you know" "I'd never disrespect you" shall I go on or is this enough....For someone to have said things like that and then "Oh I've liked her forever" (translated to 'Now that I have what I really want, who needs you, like I ever really cared') Well that hurts, bad, and it's people like Bobby who make me hate other people, and go around witht the notion of hating everything untill it proves worthy. That just spares me the hurt and dissopointment. People are cruel creatures, which is why my cross is permanently replaced with a dagger....